Know Your English (Mar 2001)

Know your English

``WHAT'S THE matter with you today? You look worried.''

``Its' not just me. Everyone in the company is worried. Atul is coming tomorrow. And everyone knows that he is the boss' hatchet man.''
``Hatchet man?''
``Do you know what a hatchet is?''
``Of course I do. It's an axe. So is a `hatchet man' someone who goes around killing people with an axe?''
``That was the original meaning, I believe. A `hatchet man' was a hired assassin.''
``Good god! What does the word mean now?''
``Nowadays the term is usually used to refer to someone who does all the dirty work for his boss. One of the meanings of `hatchet man' is someone who is hired by a company to bring about changes which the employees may not like.''
``Like getting rid of people? Firing them?''
``Yes, downsizing is one of the things that a hatchet man does.''
``Do you mean to say that all big companies have a hatchet man on their payroll?''
``That's right. Let me tell you, being a hatchet man is not an easy job. You need to...''
``...I am not really interested. I don't want to be a hatchet man. Tell me, why do you bring back those silly paintings from the office every weekend? Why don't you just leave them there? Doesn't make sense to...''
``....we have been told never to leave anything in our office over the weekend. I understand there are several people who have sticky fingers.''
``Sticky fingers? Then why don't you get them to wash their hands?''
``Ha! Ha! That's a good one. When you say that someone has sticky fingers, it implies he/she steals things. It's an expression used in informal contexts.''
``I see. There is a rumour going around that Govinda has sticky fingers.''
``That's a good example. Whenever Sunder visits our place several things go missing. There is no doubt about it. He has sticky fingers.''
``My mother got rid of our servant maid because she had sticky fingers and was always taking the small change left on the table.''
``I don't understand why people leave money lying around. Oh, by the way, there is an article about your favourite actor in today's newspaper. Have you read it?''
``No, I haven't had the time. What does it say?''
``According to the writer, your hero doesn't have horse sense.''
``Horse sense? What do you mean by that? Do you mean to say that he doesn't know anything about horse racing?''
``No, no! That's not what horse sense means. When you say that someone has no horse sense, it implies that he has no common sense.''
``Horse sense means common sense, eh? That's interesting.''
``Here's an example. Horse sense told me that I would be a fool to buy any of the shares that my cousin was trying to sell me.''
``Our school Principal is not a great scholar, but he has enough horse sense to tackle everyday problems.''
``That's a good example. Here's another. Ramesh is of the opinion that women in general don't have horse sense.''
``If Sujatha comes to know about this she will tear him to pieces.''
``True. Horse sense tells him that he should not air such views in Sujatha's presence.''
``That's a good idea. Do you know that Sujatha's father has bought Mr. Sinha's old car?''
``Good grief! Why has he bought that dreadful thing! He's really scraped the bottom of the barrel to get that old car. How could he....''
``...scraped the bottom of the barrel? I have never heard that expression before.''
``When you scrape the bottom of the barrel, you....''
``...I can probably guess the meaning of the expression. Usually when you scrape the bottom of the barrel, you get a lot of things that you don't need. Like mud, sand....''
``....excellent. When you say that someone is scraping the bottom of the barrel, it means that he/she is choosing from the worst.''
``He is choosing from what is left over. Choosing from what remains.''
``Exactly! Here are a few examples. Some of the people that the employment agency sent for the interview last week were terrible. They were really scraping the bottom of the barrel.''
``When I found out that they had hired my neighbour's son to teach maths in school, I knew they were scraping the bottom of the barrel.''
``When Sujatha asked Rakesh whether he would be interested in going to the concert with her, she knew she was scraping the bottom of the barrel.''
``When the company hired you, I knew they were scraping the bottom of the barrel. Ha! Ha!''
``I don't agree with you. I am the kind of person the company needs. Not many people have horse sense, you know.''
``I am not so sure about that. Just because you look like a horse doesn't necessarily mean you have horse sense! Anyway, let's see what the hatchet man has to say.''
``Your food stamps will be stopped effective March 1992 because we received notice that you passed away. May God bless you. You may reapply if there is a change in your circumstances.'' - Department of Social Services, Greenville, South Carolina


Source:
The Hindu daily, Tuesday, March 27, 2001